Tag Archive for gay

Help wanted

I was contacted by Lauren, a student at the University of Southampton who is writing a dissertation about the location of LGBT families. If you feel you fall into this category it would really help her out if you could fill in this short questionnaire and email it to her at lab2g10@soton.ac.uk.

Thanks all.

Love is in the air

Yesterday it was exactly 6 months since our wedding (weird as it simultaneously feels like forever ago and just last week).  To celebrate, we went out and saw ‘Woman in Black’ at the cinema yesterday.  It’s a great film and I highly recommend it, but it is very scary!  The wife doesn’t really do scary films, but she was very brave.  When we got home we had a Marks and Spencer’s Valentine’s meal for two, even though it wasn’t Valentine’s day yet because I had other plans for today.

I’m not a big proponent of Valentine’s day – an opinion my wife has tried to correct – as I am pretty much of the mind that one should celebrate a relationship all the year round and not just on a day fixed to make lots of money for the greeting cards industry.  However, with the twins on the way in July I realised that my wife’s birthday (July) and our first anniversary (August) were likely to be somewhat underwhelming celebrations due to us being up to our eyeballs in dirty nappies and vomit and our beautiful, brand new bundles of joy.

With that in mind, I decided to try and make this Valentine’s day a bit more special.  Without my wife’s knowledge I booked us tickets to Cirque du Soleil at the Royal Albert Hall tonight.  When she opened her card this morning, the tickets were inside.  I have also booked us in for an early dinner at a restaurant called Gaucho, which has a branch in Sloane Avenue.  This part of the evening is still a surprise to L (and although I normally get her to proof read my blog, this time I won’t and I’m scheduling this post to publish once we’re already there, so the surprise won’t be ruined!).  We’ve never been to Gaucho before, but have heard very good things – and it’s a steak house (L’s favourite food) so I know I can’t go wrong!

I’m also 16 weeks pregnant today – 4 months (give or take) – and this is the current state of my belly:

Beware the weird emerging belly button - do not look directly at it!

I’m feeling pretty good – although I’ve had a cold for OVER A WEEK and just cannot seem to throw it off – and I’m loving having a bump that actually is starting to look somewhat bump-like and not just like I overindulged!  I also got a ‘Baby on board’ badge from TfL which, if you live in London and use the train, tube or buses, is a really good idea.  It basically advertises the fact that yes, I would like your seat thank you very much, and avoids the awkwardness of people not wanting to insult you by suggesting you might be pregnant if you’re not.  I’m planning on wearing it with pride on our way up to Kensington this evening.

Best of all, Valentine’s day or not, I’m just really relishing the fact that it’s half term.  A week off – although it’s passing far too quickly already – is just what I needed and I now have just over a term until I go on maternity leave (probably, I haven’t officially given notice of when I plan to take it yet), which is very exciting.

We’re starting to think seriously about buggies and cots and all kinds of baby accessories, although we don’t really want to buy anything until we have moved – or at least know the dimensions of the rooms we are moving to – so I know the time will start getting away from us and the babies will be here before we know it.

Our flat is going on the market in the next couple of days, so fingers crossed we find a buyer quickly.  Lots to do and think about, but in the meantime, I’m just going to enjoy today and the rest of the week.  Half term rocks.

In a heartbeat

Yesterday we had our second scan.  The babies still look like funny, shrimpy, blobby things, but we could just make out each heartbeat, flickering somewhere in the middle of each shrimpy blob.

I’ve been really ill.  The morning sickness reached its apogee as I entered what is known as “hyper emesis” (basically, constant puking) and over the weekend we called the emergency GP and got me some anti-sickness tablets.  These cause drowsiness – on top of my twin pregnancy tiredness – but do seem to be stopping me from bringing up every goddamn thing I eat, so that’s a bonus.

The doctor also tested my urine for dehydration as apparently if pregnant women get ketones in their urine from dehydration, standard procedure is to admit that woman to hospital to rehydrate with a drip.  Thankfully, the urine test showed I was only slightly dehydrated, which was a real relief as I couldn’t bear the thought of another hospital stay, particularly one only a week before Christmas.

Of course, the doctor at Guy’s wasn’t too happy that I was even slightly dehydrated, as I’m still supposed to be drinking ridiculous amounts of water in an attempt to shrink my ovaries back down to normal size; the scan showed they are still enlarged, but slowly improving, and there was very little fluid left in my abdominal cavity.  So the bloating of my stomach may well be down to simply the enlarging of my uterus to accommodate the twins.

So, what with the sickness and the tiredness I’ve been pretty much less than useless.  I’ve managed a couple of circuits around Bluewater – with a long rest in GBK halfway through – and a brief visit to Toys R Us, but other than that, the Christmas shopping has been left up to my wife, who has been an absolute star throughout all of this.

I haven’t really had to lift a finger ever since I came out of hospital.  I went back to work for those couple of weeks – and took it as easy there as I possibly could; thankfully the pre-Christmas build-up allows for such luxuries as watching the odd DVD – but almost every minute out of work has been spent with my feet up, trying to force down some cheese straws or ginger beer to settle my stomach.  We’ve had my mother-in-law staying (for unrelated reasons) and it’s helped that L has been able to share the chores with her, but my wife really has been amazing, looking after me and making sure I’m rested and have everything I need, while she deals with the dishes and the washing and the cats and everything else!

I really am very lucky and I can’t wait until this sickness passes so I can actually start being more useful around the place and thank her properly for everything she’s done.

Although it’s still very early days and not everyone knows (although to be fair, most people do), we’re already chatting about practicalities and ideas of names – despite the fact we hardly agree on a single one.  The next major thing to do is put the flat on the market so we can move before I become too much like a beached whale and the idea of that brings with it its own stresses and excitement.

We have another scan booked for 5th January (I know, so many, but it’s because there are two of them!) and lots to look forward to in the new year.  I hope everyone has a fabulous Christmas!

Can we all just take a moment to appreciate…

How RIDICULOUSLY pregnant I look.

7 weeks and one day!  SEVEN.  WEEKS.  AND ONE. DAY!

I know I’ve got two in there, but seriously!  I am huge.

I haven’t been posting much here or on Twitter, because really all I have to say is “I feel sick.  I feel sicker.  Still feeling sick.”  Which is really rather tedious.

In other news I just can’t wait for our scan on Monday.  And also, the holidays, which start on Friday.  I really can’t wait for that!!

Holy ultrasound madness, Batman!

So, we went back to Guy’s today so that they could check up on my progress in terms of the OHSS and hopefully as well so that they could  do a scan.

Two babies!  Twins!  Of course it’s still very early days (6 weeks and one day by my count, although the doctor was a little vague about it, not having a calendar in front of him), but today we saw two little fishes swimming around in my uterus!

L is coming up with a series of nicknames for them: Pinky and Perky one week, Torville and Dean the next, Ant and Dec the week after.  We’re both slightly shell-shocked, although I was fairly convinced it had to be twins.  The doctor chuckled as he told us, saying it was no wonder I’d been so ill.

Even though it’s so early, we’re pretty much totally out of the closet at work with the whole pregnancy thing.  When I was in hospital, it was hard for L to fudge the details when people were concerned I was off work, so we ended up agreeing that if it came up specifically then it was okay for her to say.  This meant that we were freely flashing our scan picture in the staff room today when we got back from our appointment this morning.

We have another scan booked for the 19th when we hopefully should be able to see the heartbeats!

And my OHSS is much better.  My ovaries are still enlarged, but there is far less fluid in there, so although I’m still bloated, it’s not too concerning.  And we kinda have bigger things to worry about now.  Like double buggies.

Holy shit, it’s twins!

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